Ren's Ramblings & Writings

Contemplations on things tangible and intangible

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Wordless Wednesday

Raven at CMZoo

Shadow, my princess

Parker (dead doggy after a long hike)

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Just for fun (even on Wordless Wednesday..)

1.What color are your socks right? two-toned blue

2.What are you listening to right now? discourse of my kids & my father while they're washing dishes

3.What was the last thing you ate? just ate cinnimon dessert pizza (sorry)

4.Can you drive a stick shift? I learned on a duce (old Army two & one-half ton truck)

5.Last person you spoke to on the phone? my hubby

6.Do you like the person who sent this to you? N/A-I read her blog!

7.How old are you today? 42

8.What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? Olympic figure skating and gymnastics

9.What is your favorite drink? black tea with honey or a nectar

10.Have you ever dyed your hair? can't live without it

11.Favorite food? smoked salmon that only my hubby can make!

12.What is the last movie you watched? The Blind Side

13.Favorite day of the year? Close tie between 4th of July and the Renaissance Festival!

14.How do you vent? Talk to my hubby, write, meditate, or sing

15.What was your favorite toy as a child? Barbie

16.What is your favorite season? Spring

17.Cherries or blueberries? Both; use in cereal, smoothies, etc

18.Do you want your friends to e-mail you back? sure, why not

19.Who is the most likely to respond? not sure-ditto

20.Who is least likely to respond? is this really important?

21.Living situation: In my beautiful house, my hubby, my two sons, my princess cat Shadow and my lioness kitten, Solstice, husky Sienna, and currently, Grandpa is with us

22.When was the last time you cried? must we air dirty laundry?.. Christmas night (drunk sister acting inappropriate)

23.What is on the floor of your closet right now? which closet? LR just has shoes, toys, and vaccuum

24.Who is the friend you have had the longest that you are sending to? Lisa G.

25.What did you do last night? masters degree homework

26.What are you most afraid of? Spiders, failure...let's see, boats

27.Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? Swiss cheese & mushrooms

28.Favorite dog breed? Huskies, Goldens, Australian Shephards

29.Favorite day of the week? I don't have one these days

30.How many states have you lived in? 10 (if military training counts)

31.Diamonds or pearls? I used to think rocks belonged on the side of a mountain, but, I truly adore my wedding ring, do diamonds

32.What is your favorite flower? Cala lillies... lilacs...gerbera daisies... must I choose?

Find previous person's list at Laughs & Frustrations of a Proud Army Wife

Wordless Wednesdays- our camp fire -summer 2010

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Is Facebook a Blessing or a Curse?

There seem to be mixed responses among military wives at Is Facebook a Blessing or a Curse?.  Here is my feeling on the matter:

The issue is how we cope through their absence. My husband, now over 20 years of service, is leaving in a few months (not including a year in Korea). We have had separations with and without the use of any internet technology.

How we manage during these times is a matter of choice. Our responses are often a result of our own insecurities ("why is he posting on someone else's wall and not mine?”), which will eat us alive. Do not let unfounded insecurities not only paralyze you.

In a healthy relationship, you will have a life outside of that relationship - if I have 5 minutes to post on someone else's wall, why can't he if he gets the chance? In a healthy relationship, this is not a problem. We all have friends, family and acquaintances outside of our primary relationship. And we use whatever practical tools we have to communicate with them. There was a time when being overseas meant the only communication was through written letters. Phone calls were impractical and costly. Facebook is just another form of writing that requires less time, thought, or effort to be connected. And the connection is superficial. Facebook is a spontaneous tool for short notes and pictures.

Facebook should not be the only tool we use to communicate with loved ones. Letters and phone calls connect us better. We tend to abbreviate correspondence when using the internet. I remember when my husband did not have reliable phone access and had no internet access. Every few weeks he would go to a place where he had to pay by the minute to use the computer or make a phone call. And he wrote letters. I still treasure those letters.

We will use Facebook this next time around, but I am not reliant on it, and not hurt if he chooses to communicate (briefly as is the way with Facebook) with someone else. I am the one on whom he spends the money to call over static-filled phone lines. I am the one he is coming home to. But I will cherish every photo or comment he gets the chance to post on Facebook that gives me a small insight to what he is experiencing and how he is doing life at that moment.